Tuesday, September 30, 2008

Working Man

So I’m employed now. I like it and stuff. Easy work, decent pocket money.
But I keep getting this nagging feeling of being just a little too early to jump onto the work bandwagon. Everyone’s studying. Not me. I had enough of that to last me a lifetime. Though I do realize I’ll have to get back to it sometime soon.

Which leaves the question – What am I going to do now?

Funny Man.

A sense of humor doesn’t work.


You’ve all heard it, people saying that their ideal partner is someone “funny”. If that were true, we should be a race of comedians by now. Instead, I find people who wouldn’t know a joke if it was slapped on their faces by Jet Lee. People aren’t looking for funny. They THINK they are. Yes, I think I’m funny. My ego cannot grow any larger. I admit it. Now that we have that out of the way, have you ever noticed how most people take in everything you say seriously? Even when it is so outrageous that anybody who believed it would not say it out loud, and instead wear a white hooded cape and gather with the rest of their group in the woods to talk about it. For example, I recently claimed that all feminists are bra burning armpit sniffers. I get a cold look and “Really? That’s what you think about the women’s lib movement?”. I give a nice, cheery “Yup, and the rest of ‘em are only fit to stay at home with the kids. Otherwise god would have given men mammaries! Har!”

To which I get the reply “Ooookaaaay…. I hope you don’t have any plans on getting married.”

Why is that the general comeback of nearly all females when someone says stuff like that? It assumes that our goal in life is to get hitched to some Nazi feminist. I’m eighteen for Chrissakes! I don’t know what I’m going to do tomorrow, let alone about marriage!

What is so hard to notice about sarcasm? Why do people keep thinking there are actually people who believe that stuff, and that they would pour it all out to them of all people? This applies to both genders.

Point is, people say they want humor. What they want is “Okay, so a priest and a gerbil walk into a bar…”

Pffft. Generalization is fun.

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Mamas Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Cowboys

Mamas Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Suicide Bombers…

Don’t let em play with bombs and hidin in trucks,
Make em be Doctors and Lawyers and such

Mamas Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Suicide Bombers…

They’ll never stay home and they’re always alone,
Even with someone they love

A bomber ain easy to love, an he’s harder to hold,
He’d rather give you an arm than diamonds or gold
One-pull bomb triggers and old faded devices,
And each night begins a new fire
If you don’t understand him
An he don’t die young,
He’ll prob’ly just blow himself up


That’s as far as I got. Can’t make out the rest of this song too accurately… Maybe later when I take a look at the lyrics.

Books

As promised, here. This list might have been influenced by my current state of scavenger-hood.

1) Learning to Cook by Some Author - Extremely Useful.
2) The Rotary Guide to Indian Food – Apply methods from above book into this.
3) The Bible – The soul needs some form of relief in these trying times.


Regarding novels and things, I really can’t pick out a top three. I just remember a few notable ones I read recently were “The Life of Pi by Yann Martel” and “Reaper Man by Terry Pratchett”. But most of the stuff I read these days is off the net. Some pretty interesting stuff can be dug up at ubersite.com.

Friday, September 12, 2008

Nothing, Living on "Teh Edge" and Obama

So yeah... I'm doing nothing now...
And it's tiring. I didn't realize how hard it is to just do nothing for weeks. Yes, it takes effort to do nothing. That's why they call it "Actively doing nothing".

Anyway, my mother's not home for two weeks, so most meals are now improvised. I had roti and chocolate sauce for breakfast today :/ Yes, tis a hard life, and my last journal entry read thus -

"Day 6 : Food supplies running low. I saw someone swipe the last bit of my bread pudding the other day. It's every man for himself now. Potatoes have become our bread and butter.

I might not make another entry for a few days, or maybe even never again. Already started hallucinating. A potato asked me to save the whales when I was boiling it.

I have to go now, for I fear any more sitting at this PC will allow them to break me. THEM. The potatoes. 

..."

You might argue that they're not all that bad, for example, they're great as pets. Keep them long enough an they start sprouting little... things. But trust me, they're evil. But on the other hand, I'm honing my skills all the time. For example I learnt that custard powder tastes very bad, and that you shouldn't try to open little packets with your mouth. Also that it is best not to use a meat cleaver to clean your fingernails.

But I'm off on a tangent again... In other news, I'm experimenting with Flash to make my portfolio and leaving the PC on for hours rendering stuff in Cinema 4D. Hopefully I'll have a job by the time the astronomical electricity bill arrives. 

And with the great wisdom of all teenagers, I cast my vote for the black guy in the elections in the US. The white guy's a redneck.

I can see the headlines now "An epic battle between white and black, good and evil, gay marriage and free beer!". And don't be all "Ohh look he's calling him a black guy!". What AM I supposed to call him then? It's the easiest way to identify the dude, you racist!

And with that meaningless message I sign off for yet another week of aimless wandering...


P.S. - The top three books list will be posted later!