Leaving On A Jet Plane

I will be missing for two weeks. Leaving for India on saturday. Thursday and Friday are free so I won't be posting.

And er...

Yeah, that's it.

Hell, I think twitter has castrated my word-spewing capability. I can't seem to get a post out.

!

Oh well, later maybe.

Don't Hate Me Because I'm Happy

I have made a groundbreaking discovery. Well not literally breaking the ground, but it'll at least shake the ground a bit from all the people stomping their feet on it out of indignation. Indignation at what, you ask? I shall tell you, right after these announcements -

I have chucked the hutch. Picked up an Airtel to replace it as my trusty secondary SIM. So yeah, everyone who took me down a notch from 'Awesome' to 'Bloody Brilliant' can just raise me back up in their opinion of me. Thank you.

My shoulder hurts for some reason. Like I've been driving it into a concrete pillar repeatedly. Before you ask, no I haven't been practicing my tackling with my brother. Nothing as exciting as that I'm afraid, just been sleeping on it too rough, I guess. Yeah, I sleep hard. I sleep a real man's sleep, with four pillows. Thought I'd rough it today and lost one. Guess I was just being too reckless.

Yes, back to the groundbreaking discovery. But er... I... Well it seems to have slipped my mind. Will remember soon, so till then,

The only reason two random people meet, start dating etc. is because of phone companies. Not because they allow the two to stay in touch, but because the phone companies themselves engineer the relationship. I suspect that these 'Call center workers' are really just office drones who go through secret profiles of many thousands of people a day, finding matches. I mean, how many of us has used one of these 'call centers'? Once they find two that match reasonably well, they make arrangements. Arrangements for the two to meet. Somehow. Either through mutual friends who are actually undercover agents, online or through some other fluke, they meet. Then the companies proceed to bombard the two with targeted advertising. You see, getting those two to switch to their network is like bagging a small business's business. My talk time, till recently, after many months of usage, was a mere 25-odd hours on the current phone. Then in just under two months, it jumps to nearly 150 hours, and I'm suddenly giving consideration to battery endurance on phones. But see, you have to get _just_ the right match, or you don't talk much at all, as evidenced by my earlier raggedy-man time of just over a day's worth. That would explain the many thousands of texts stacked up.

Oh yes, the discovery.

Yeah uh...

There is no discovery and you're all [insert insult of choice] for reading this far.

Listen Here

All you buggers and buggerettes getting your panties in a bunch over not being in the last post, calm the hell down. They're just random clicks I got through your very blogrolls.

In other news, it's odd how much this whole 'Jerry' thing helps deal with stuff. Ya know, the whole 'I wouldn't care if a walrus was gnawing at my nipples' attitude. Whatever gets flung at me, I just refer it to him and it's done for.

Have you noticed how the rest of the blogosphere is developing slightly schizophrenic tendencies? Yeah, creepy. You'll never see ME doing that...

Oh well, Might as well bide my time...

So I'm waiting in a cafe for someone and thought I'd make a post to alleviate the boredom. Visit a random blog, and start clicking from there. Listed below are my findings.

• Whacko's labels list has Good and Evil in equal measure(2). Also a misspelled conundrum, egg, and a relieving sign of his heterosexuality in the form of (1) post on Men, and (12) on Women. I also get a kick out of seeing I'm the only blogger listed on it. That is, unless Anarkali or Ranjan Ramanayake have blogs. But that is quickly offset by his vastly greater number of followers.
  
• Go over to the darkside. See yet another video of some hands playing a piano. Shudder at the horde of female fans.
• F**CK F**CK F**CK F**CK F**CK F**CK
• No, that wasn't at the Piano post. Something completely unrelated that just happened.
• Hmmm....
• Bah....
• Anyone want cookies?
  
• Still on the darkside, a map thingy showing readers all over the globe coming to see the maestro at work. Or play. Whichever it is.
• *envy*
• Go to DeeCee's blog. Some Buddha thing. Meh... I doubt people would go on a rampage even if there WAS a Jesus Bar. What with the whole water > wine thing, it might even be quite popular :P
• Apple, change the world? pfft. Steve Jobs is a celebrity. Why must you idolise him for that?
• Eyeliner and I? What be this...
• GAH!! Poetry! Frantically click back.
• What else be there.... Delilah Says Deliberations. Never thought people called Delilah actually existed. Just assumed it was a name made up for movies and things. I mean, it's like... I dunno. Fiction-ey.
• Another post which I find a bit difficult to make head or tail of, so I refrain from comenting here. Er... Anyway,
• Click on Jack's Point of View. Spanish music. Ooooh, Volare. Heard the Russel Watson version of it. Can't listen to anything due to lack of any sound from this PC. Oh well, moving on we see...
• Sabby's blog is still missing.
• Life in Taprobane. Woah, nice images. But... That last picture. How is the fish standing on it's side like that? Is is stuck by the fin to the rigifoam box?
• SI has a map too, but it's coloured all brown, possibly reflecting his current view out the window of endless desert.

Wait. Why am I still writing this post? I'm off to get something to eat.
Cheerio, see ya'll at the next post.

You've Changed. And other things.

I'm not sure I know you any more. You used to keep me happy for hours on end, never failing to meet my every need. But now you've changed. Ever so slightly. I notice these things. You don't keep going for as long as you used to. I notice these slight changes, and I don't think we can work them out without 'outside help'. Or just completely abandon this thing. Yes, I have considered leaving you. Another looms in the horizon and I'm considering it. I think it started that day I got you all wet. You dried off and started being normal again but you're just not the same. You even froze up on me once. But, I guess I'll just have to go get you serviced. Abans should do...

-----

The women's cricket world cup is going on. Why were we not alerted to the existence of this event? Were they trying to hide it from the world? Were they playing a newly discovered game of Stealth Cricket, wherein the players are disguised as pedestrians on the street and play off the streets of Melbourne, stealthily bowling through crowds, and batting ever so lightly using little ping pong paddles? Come on, show us. We won't laugh.
CB, now you know what a chauvinist _I_ am. ;)

-----

Been playing F.E.A.R. 2 : Project Origin the last few days. It's a decent sequel to the first but takes a while to get used to after the more... free... shooters like Crysis and Far Cry. It still retains the old rushing through corridors lined with indestructible piles of paper feel. Seriously. I couldn't even break apart an LCD monitor. Maybe I was playing on settings not high enough for advanced physics effects :/ But you do get used to it after a while and it's still fun. Scary too. But I had the bright idea of keeping the grenade key on "G" and the flashlight on "F". Much confusion ensues each time I try to switch on my flashlight to look at a dark corner. OR when I try yo sneak a grenade into the middle of a patrol and instead light them up with the high beam.

-----

Why don't we have a men's day? Women have women's day, women's rights and all the other associated paraphernalia that you're allowed to gather if oppressed. What the hell? And I wish all you cows spewing propaganda on women's day cramps in all eight of your stomachs.
:P


-----

Oh yeah, as per the first para, I think my phone's losing battery life. It's dead by the end of a day of slightly more than average use. :(

Untitled 3 - Buses & Hair

You know what? Monday, I wasn't too late, I was too early. I got to fort around 10pm yesterday, and got off at the station. Didn't have a bag full of wet clothes to carry around so I wasn't too weary of walking. Not finding my bus at the station, I head off to pettah. Iron Man starts playing. I felt like Rambo or something, stalking through the pavement stalls in the darkness. But it seemed alright, since there were many more people around. I just managed to get a seat on a bus which was rapidly filling up. Saw a bunch of open shops along the way too. So it was just that fate decided to drop me just beyond the "living" radius from Colombo.

Anyway, what I got here to say was, why in the world do we have hair? Why couldn't we have just gotten fur? Ever since I got back from camp It's been acting all weird. One minute it'll be all Bob Marley-esque curls and the next it'll be plastered down like a cat on the highway in front of two rapidly approaching headlights being followed by 18 wheels. People usually go on these things to find themselves. My hair seems to have lost itself. So I yell "Don't screw with me hair!!11one" and it goes still for a second. Then it just makes me look like Charlie Chaplin and yells back "You don't scare mee!". Stupid hair. I am powerless against it. It haunts me in my sleep. Seriously, it'll get all straight and try to poke me in the eye. Way to kill the mood when you're dreaming of - ..nevermind. I tried poisoning it by throwing kerosene on it, like, you know, kerosene irritates things like snakes and well hair is long and you know, the Medusa had snakess for hair and like, so, hair == snakes. But it just got in my eyes and I got o spend the day at the hospital. Why doesn't anyone get the snake analogy? It's like this. Imagine the hair is a fish that lives only in salty water, and that it breeds once in three weeks. Now think of the snakes as polar bears, who hibernate for long periods. Now, polar bears are white. You get what I'm saying? Yeah, that one always works.

So anyway,

I swear, if it weren't already dead I'd send it all to the gallows. But since the best way to torture the dead(As we all learn from TV) is to make them wander the earth rattling chains. They get really cranky and go all "mokada do???" at you. So I decided to nick some of the jewellery lying around the house and draped it over my head. Now I am a Pharoah. King Tut En Jerrymahn.

Meh
I think I need a Panadol or two... Headdd







****Now Playing****
Finally got back to gaming. Stopped halfway in Dead Space.
Modelling a Miata instead. You will see the fruits of my labours soon :D

Gone

Slowly going black
1 in 11,000,000 they said
It'll never happen
Smart asses
It's not THEM all around him
People, families
Mothers, fathers
Children
It was getting a little too wet for his liking
Blue and white ribbons gathering
Bits and pieces still sticking out
He thought back
Animals
The panic
Fear
Anger
Spilt drinks too
He tried to go back

"Please attach your own mask before assisting young children"




Meh... I need to go listen to some Mr. Brightside... I will be back in force come tuesday :P

One of THOSE posts

I'm in a contemplative mood today. Not that I'm not always contemplating things, like how I'd look in that dude's t shirt or what a sock tastes like, but at the moment it's different. I've been trying to read Excession, written quite brilliantly by Iain Banks, and my mind's back in that 'why did I have to be living back in the 21st century' mode.

But alas, my skills in getting what is in my mind onto my blog are too amateurish to attempt an explanation. I think the problem lies somewhere between the keyboard and my chair. So instead, I will regale you with tales yesteryearday.

It began at the usual 12am. I was awake. Worse, I was under the misguided impression that I was being terribly funny while half asleep. I apologize to any who had to witness it. There should be some kind of law where you can't use words longer than two syllables from 1am - 6am. They might sound like a good idea at the time, but it's like eating ice cream with a fork. It might work, but it's just not right. Then I went to sleep. Then I was awake again. Then on TV there were some tanks and things going by and I was going 'omg omg the Russians are here! get to the basement oh noes we don't _have_ a basement!!!' and then someone told me it was just the GI Joe movie with our president as Cobra so I calmed down. Then I threw fire extinguishers at zombies till breakfast. But a beaver ate my scones so I kicked it. And THEN the neighbor started playing rap music so I opened the window and yelled "HOW BOUT SOME TCHAIKOVSKY YOU PAGANS!!??" and he hit me with a shovel so I threw the cat at him.

After that it was a blur of doing nothing, going out to a friend's place to get some movies and back home for dinner.

Oops, I did it again. Not sing along to Britney Spears, just that this thing is turning into a diary. I think I am rapidly going into that zone where I won't need the "not quite" bit of the blog title...

:(

You Know Who's Kickass?

Liam Neeson in "Taken".

Man, that guy kicked so many kinds of ass he could probably eat gravel.

...Yeah, been watching lotsa movies. Reviews will be posted, shortly.

Mamma Mia, and Music

I am writing a post about the movie "Mamma Mia".

I watched it. yes.

Anyway, I liked it too. Now, don't get me wrong. I'm as much a jackass as any guy out there, and would never own up to liking this movie in person. But well, since I probably won't see anyone who reads this for some time, or at least till you forget, s'okay.

Now, my experience with musicals is limited to just three movies. This, Hairspray and Phantom of the Opera. Nevertheless, I shall give you an in-depth and thorough review of this movie. :P

The story's pretty straightforward, just run of the mill stuff. And in the end we don't even know who the father is either. Oh yeah, there might be spoilers in here. But it was a fun movie. Just that saying it out loud could get you beaten up in public. I dunno, is it a chick movie? It sure has all the ingredients...
Shallow story, Fairytale-ish occurrences sprinkled about and lots of "Girl Power". Which reminds me, Why can't we have "Man Power"? :D Another post or another day I guess.

And now onto the PS's -
Ever noticed how the music you listen to sets your mood? I put on some Tool on my way home, and felt like staring down everyone in sight. Then I switch to Sarah Brightman, and I'm all "..." and "peace, brother". :/

And does anyone know what the starting lyrics of "Hymn to Her" by the Pretenders mean?

"Ive been your lover
From the womb to the tomb
I dress as your daughter
When the moon becomes round
You be my mother
When everything's gone"

Just sounds like some serious incest going on in there, like a redneck family reunion...

Multiple Posts

I've been posting two posts at a time these past few days, and I've noticed something.
You don't notice the one I post first.

That is, according to google analytics. I am yet to think of a viable explanation for this yet, and yes, I DO want people to read what I write. I do not profess to "just write my thoughts down". I AM narcissistic.
And thank god for firefox's spell check.

So, one post a time now.

:D

The untitled post!

…………………..

More and more it seems like there is absolutely nothing to write about here. Oh, and all you morons who are shouting “Then Don’t!” can go hump a sofa.

Life is just too uneventful these days. Sure, I hear people say stupid things, things that strike you with the same effect as one day wandering into your garage and finding your parents are spandex clad superheroes, just about to depart on a mission. And yet I can find nothing of substance to write in here. And the fact that my classmates now find it amusing to occasionally visit here and remind me of all I’ve written doesn’t help either. Anyone still anonymous and considering going public, stay the hell away! It’s just not worth it. Anything of real meaning will have to wait till after I’m through with the whole school thing. People might say “Life’s short, you might get hit by a bus tomorrow, so live like there’s no tomorrow”. Screw that*. Life’s long, and even on the off chance I do get hit by a bus, the knowledge that a riotous mob would burn said bus and its driver is enough for me to be happy for the rest of eternity. Imagine, leaving the earth in a blazing inferno!

So here I go with an empty mind…

“ It was a dark and stormy evening. I stepped off the bus as it was splashing its way down to a fraction of its top speed. I scurry into the shelter of the bus stop, where there were people, people waiting for buses, or just escaping the pouring rain. The rain, the tropical rain which drips liquid ice all over its temporary territories was hammering down particularly hard that day. I turn my attention back to the people inside the bus stop. One of them in particular, caught my eye. He was standing in a shadowy corner, and was… glowing, literally. It looked as if he was on his way to a sign-makers’ to get himself bent into a notice saying “vacancy”. Coolio. I sidle up to him, and I noticed he was…

At this moment my jeans pocket starts vibrating. ”

Damn it! Just when I manage to make things interesting for myself… “Where are you and why are you late?” I reply with my location and ask whether she does not notice the rain which threatens to melt the entire country with its constant splattering. “What rain? You’re imagining things again”. Fine, there was no rain. “Just come home and take your medication will you? We’ll make the rain go away together”. And she wonders where I got my sarcasm from…

I realize I just wrote an entire post about nothing in particular. I could just use the excuse about signs of aging if I wasn’t just 18. Maybe some sort of early-life crisis?

*Anyone seen that movie starring Chris Rock? The thing in which he’s a regular married man? Anyway, that line’s derived from that movie. Don’t flame me with “You stole that whole thing from a movie you asshole!!!”

This means you too Kiran!

*Stuff*

Filler post!

Movies I watched the past few days. Being the excellent critic I am, and having my impeccable taste in movies, You can be sure you're getting the truth. :D -

Alien Vs. Predator 2 - It seemed impossible that this movie could be bad. It had Aliens, and Predators. Also a few wimpy humans to boot. All three races fighting in close proximity promised a tornado of alien killing, blood spurting action. But, going against the laws of nature, it sucked. Big time.

Charlie Wilson's War - It's a great movie, just that I don't have much to say about it. Just watch the thing, will ya?

The Golden Compass - This is one great movie! It's got fantasy worlds, talking Polar Bears and flying ship things, all of which ensure a great journey into the world of "His Dark Materials"

Meet the Spartans - Funny in parts, but as a whole, doesn't really get you rolling on the floor laughing. What? you think people don't mean it when they say ROFL?

Jumper - Watched with a couple of friends. It wasn't blockbuster class, but it provided a few good moments. Not enough though.


That 70's Show - Watching the first season. Man this show is awesome!

Heroes - Second season. Some people said it was worse than the first, but I beg to differ. Sylar's alive, more people with cool powers and Peter getting even more powerful!


Will post a proper post sometime AFTER the 23rd or so. Going to India, so will have some stuff to jot down...