The new year is a knockin'

So 2009 is at our doorstep. Actually, in our doorway and asking to be let in. So this year has been weird. And to sum it up, I'm going to pour out the contents of my "Notes" folder on my phone. It's not really a summary of my actions per se, but more like what was going through my head. Most of them make no sense as single sentences, but are the essence of an idea. I'll expand them so that they can be read.

I'll ignore the fact that most of it was written in the last three months. Also the fact that this is going to be by far my most disjointed post.


- Losing your glasses is like living in a dream. It's all literally just a blur for a while. Thankfully I'm not too handicapped by it. After a while I got used to it.

- As technology progresses, we go from smart people in front of dumb terminals to dumb people in front of smart terminals.

- Master Chief is only a letter away from Master Chef. Halo anyone?

- KFC! The only thing missing is U!

- If I were stuck on some deserted island for eternity, I would make a girl out of coconuts. Even though it is highly likely she'll want to be 'just friends'.

- Everyone needs goals. Even if they're goals such as "I'm gonna eat that ice cream if it kills me".

- People who go "people suck/change/'shouldn't be trusted'" suck. People means you too. Besides, acting like every person you meet is an axe murderer is just lame. I usually ask people and they say no, they haven't murdered any axes recently. But I guess it would bode well for me only if I was an axe. All that from the note "emo, axe murderer".

- And then there's this note for which I can't remember the explanation. "Making things is progress, boring. Life withoutu conflict is teh goal". I dunno. Maybe I tend to go all existential on my phone's ass when I'm half asleep.


Well, there.

Disturbed is awesome.

I'm changing my name. Blog name. And the theme and stuff. Later.

Anyway, this post is a product of boredom.

Oh yeah, I lost my glasses a few weeks ago, so if you see a guy squinting at oncoming buses, hit him on the head because that's not me. I'll be the guy swuinting at buses and cussing under my breath at them.

Notice how you enjoy music less once you start listening to the words? I was, till recently, blissfully unaware of all but the most obvious lyrical dances that all the artists were crooning. Now it seems I can't NOT pay attention to what they say. :'(

Would have been okay if a lot of songs weren't written by hippies. It feels like a hippy gnawing at my brains when I listen to some tracks.

Meh, i have to stop posting when I'm bored...

Of Hair and Things

So I needed to get my hair cut. But unlike most of you who would spend enough to feed a small african family to cut off your hair, I'm much more... frugal about it. So off I went to the nearest "saloon". Sit in the chair, "Wediya kota karanna epa", I tell him, hoping I wouldn't blind oncoming vehicles with the reflection off my skull on the way back.

He took out his shaving thingy, and swish, he stabbed it into my scalp. As he slowly pulled it away, I realized that I could see a bit more of my head than I'm used to. So I open my mouth to tell him to stop, but realized it wouldn't do any good since then I'd just look like Dr. Frankenstein cut my hair. So, with a look much like you see on inmates' faces when they are put to their first haircut at prison, I sat through it and let Mr. Sweeny Todd have his way with my hair.

So now I look like I went AWOL from the army.

Bleh, shit post.

Woohoo! Gmail themes!

Now your inbox can be sexy too! Look and be amazed!

http://lame-duck.com/forum/download/file.php?id=504&mode=view

Click for larger image.

And no, this one's not like the last link I posted :P

So I was looking for an album...

A Life of Saturdays, to be exact. And I wind up with nothing.

Something's wrong with the interwebs I tell you. "Leaving Town" is still occasionally sprinkled across the radio waves, yet his album does not grace the pages of the almighty ISOhunt.

Granted, This isn't exactly legal, but still. One of the sites listed the album as having been seeded "So long ago".

Meh...

Multiple Posts

I've been posting two posts at a time these past few days, and I've noticed something.
You don't notice the one I post first.

That is, according to google analytics. I am yet to think of a viable explanation for this yet, and yes, I DO want people to read what I write. I do not profess to "just write my thoughts down". I AM narcissistic.
And thank god for firefox's spell check.

So, one post a time now.

:D

The Jester's Theory of Poya Days

I've had a lot of time to think these days, and I am quite sure that I have stumbled upon a... breakthrough, in the field of social behaviors and history.

My theory is concerning Poya Days, or full moon days when we Sri lankans all get a holiday, and why we have them. Well, here it is :

Many thousands of years ago, back when Buddhism was just arriving, there lived a clan of werewolves in Sri Lanka. There were also regular humans around, as you might have been taught.

Now, these two "factions" could have lived in harmony if not for the fact that werewolves love kurakkan. And the villagers had it in abundance.
Also, the werewolves were at their most powerful during the full moon. Therefore, to protect themselves from the werewolf menace, the villagers built mini-forts and holed up in these dome shaped structures(Because everyone knows werewolves hate domes) and waited out the full moon with their kurakkan safely stored in the forts.

And so eventually the werewolves died of starvation since they couldn't get any kurakkan.

That is, in it's entirety, my theory on why we have poya days.

Below is the evidence -

Notice the rising sun, commonly seen in sunny paradise isles like ours. Also the distinctly tropical trees in the background.


And the final piece of evidence -

Convincing, innit?

Working Man

So I’m employed now. I like it and stuff. Easy work, decent pocket money.
But I keep getting this nagging feeling of being just a little too early to jump onto the work bandwagon. Everyone’s studying. Not me. I had enough of that to last me a lifetime. Though I do realize I’ll have to get back to it sometime soon.

Which leaves the question – What am I going to do now?

Mamas Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Cowboys

Mamas Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Suicide Bombers…

Don’t let em play with bombs and hidin in trucks,
Make em be Doctors and Lawyers and such

Mamas Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up To Be Suicide Bombers…

They’ll never stay home and they’re always alone,
Even with someone they love

A bomber ain easy to love, an he’s harder to hold,
He’d rather give you an arm than diamonds or gold
One-pull bomb triggers and old faded devices,
And each night begins a new fire
If you don’t understand him
An he don’t die young,
He’ll prob’ly just blow himself up


That’s as far as I got. Can’t make out the rest of this song too accurately… Maybe later when I take a look at the lyrics.

Nothing, Living on "Teh Edge" and Obama

So yeah... I'm doing nothing now...
And it's tiring. I didn't realize how hard it is to just do nothing for weeks. Yes, it takes effort to do nothing. That's why they call it "Actively doing nothing".

Anyway, my mother's not home for two weeks, so most meals are now improvised. I had roti and chocolate sauce for breakfast today :/ Yes, tis a hard life, and my last journal entry read thus -

"Day 6 : Food supplies running low. I saw someone swipe the last bit of my bread pudding the other day. It's every man for himself now. Potatoes have become our bread and butter.

I might not make another entry for a few days, or maybe even never again. Already started hallucinating. A potato asked me to save the whales when I was boiling it.

I have to go now, for I fear any more sitting at this PC will allow them to break me. THEM. The potatoes. 

..."

You might argue that they're not all that bad, for example, they're great as pets. Keep them long enough an they start sprouting little... things. But trust me, they're evil. But on the other hand, I'm honing my skills all the time. For example I learnt that custard powder tastes very bad, and that you shouldn't try to open little packets with your mouth. Also that it is best not to use a meat cleaver to clean your fingernails.

But I'm off on a tangent again... In other news, I'm experimenting with Flash to make my portfolio and leaving the PC on for hours rendering stuff in Cinema 4D. Hopefully I'll have a job by the time the astronomical electricity bill arrives. 

And with the great wisdom of all teenagers, I cast my vote for the black guy in the elections in the US. The white guy's a redneck.

I can see the headlines now "An epic battle between white and black, good and evil, gay marriage and free beer!". And don't be all "Ohh look he's calling him a black guy!". What AM I supposed to call him then? It's the easiest way to identify the dude, you racist!

And with that meaningless message I sign off for yet another week of aimless wandering...

P.S. - The top three books list will be posted later!

Leaving Town

Well, school. Just that I couldn’t remember any songs titled “Leaving school”.
Anyway, I’m in the middle of my final exams now, and it feels… the same as before. Just hasn’t hit me that I’ll be leaving.

There will be lots of people I’ll never again see, and some whom will probably keep texting me incessantly till I die. So a big Screw You All! Going out to anybody I hate. All the others, I shall keep in touch. I’ll try. Okay I’ll finally add you people on facebook. Having just twenty odd friends on it gets pretty boring. And creepy.

I haven’t been posting much these days, not because of the lack of time due to exams but just general laziness. But thank you for thinking it was because of the former :D I hope to find more things to write about after I’m out of school.

And getting out of school will be pretty interesting. I just want to get my character certificate before my results show up and the rector decides “He was such a good boy” is a horrid mistake. Speaking of results, mine should be interesting. Watching through seasons four to eight of That 70’s Show didn’t do any good either. Neither does typing this thing in. But I have chemistry tomorrow, and nobody really likes chemistry.

Also, I will be looking for a job! Something along the lines of design. Go to thejester100.deviantart.com for samples.

Well, that’s it for now. Will post something later after these horrid examinations are over.

The untitled post!

…………………..

More and more it seems like there is absolutely nothing to write about here. Oh, and all you morons who are shouting “Then Don’t!” can go hump a sofa.

Life is just too uneventful these days. Sure, I hear people say stupid things, things that strike you with the same effect as one day wandering into your garage and finding your parents are spandex clad superheroes, just about to depart on a mission. And yet I can find nothing of substance to write in here. And the fact that my classmates now find it amusing to occasionally visit here and remind me of all I’ve written doesn’t help either. Anyone still anonymous and considering going public, stay the hell away! It’s just not worth it. Anything of real meaning will have to wait till after I’m through with the whole school thing. People might say “Life’s short, you might get hit by a bus tomorrow, so live like there’s no tomorrow”. Screw that*. Life’s long, and even on the off chance I do get hit by a bus, the knowledge that a riotous mob would burn said bus and its driver is enough for me to be happy for the rest of eternity. Imagine, leaving the earth in a blazing inferno!

So here I go with an empty mind…

“ It was a dark and stormy evening. I stepped off the bus as it was splashing its way down to a fraction of its top speed. I scurry into the shelter of the bus stop, where there were people, people waiting for buses, or just escaping the pouring rain. The rain, the tropical rain which drips liquid ice all over its temporary territories was hammering down particularly hard that day. I turn my attention back to the people inside the bus stop. One of them in particular, caught my eye. He was standing in a shadowy corner, and was… glowing, literally. It looked as if he was on his way to a sign-makers’ to get himself bent into a notice saying “vacancy”. Coolio. I sidle up to him, and I noticed he was…

At this moment my jeans pocket starts vibrating. ”

Damn it! Just when I manage to make things interesting for myself… “Where are you and why are you late?” I reply with my location and ask whether she does not notice the rain which threatens to melt the entire country with its constant splattering. “What rain? You’re imagining things again”. Fine, there was no rain. “Just come home and take your medication will you? We’ll make the rain go away together”. And she wonders where I got my sarcasm from…

I realize I just wrote an entire post about nothing in particular. I could just use the excuse about signs of aging if I wasn’t just 18. Maybe some sort of early-life crisis?

*Anyone seen that movie starring Chris Rock? The thing in which he’s a regular married man? Anyway, that line’s derived from that movie. Don’t flame me with “You stole that whole thing from a movie you asshole!!!”

This means you too Kiran!

Ten things vs. Regular Post

Funny thing is, I already typed up another post thinking this was the same "Seven random things about you" chain which I dead ended last year, with three extra things. I just found out that it's "Ten things that make me feel happy".

Anyway,

1) Technology -
Although the past week has been a black one for most stuff around me. First my phone memory card goes bust, and then the one I buy to replace it turns out to be slightly incompatible, so I have to wait another week till they get a different brand down. Then I break the glass turntable in the microwave. Then my monitor stops working, so I’m stuck with a crummy 15-inch. Thoughts of sabotage entered my mind when the bus I was traveling in broke down in the middle of the road today.

2) Music -
I just ripped "The Flying Carpet". No, it's not the Aladdin soundtrack. Nice, relaxing music. Although I do push in the occasional Alter Bridge. Something unpleasant happened this last week in music. I copied off all the new music on my brother's mp3 player like I usually do, and was assailed by the likes of S Club 7 and NSync. Apparently, he had autofilled it with random tracks from his office.

3) Weird stuff, like have you ever noticed that you can’t lick your elbows?

4) Laughing -
Most recently, at the audience on the Tyra Show. Those people have been dragged over from a telemarketing show methinks. And considering that everyone who appears on the Tyra Show is either terribly maimed or nutty as a fruitcake, or both if you count Tyra, they appear to be what is scientifically called "Tasteless Bovines"

5) Messed up situations -
I was about 8 years old. And I was at a funeral. We were all gathered round the grave, some fifty-odd people. My cousin(6) and I were way at the back. Suddenly, he grabs my sleeve and points. I turn to see a skull, dug up by some dog and just showing out of the ground. We both start shouting “A skull! A skull!” not in panic, but out of sheer excitement. You can imagine what sort of reaction this caused in the adults. Each of them spun round and stared at us as if we had just murdered the poor guy. Two kids shouting out in joy about a dead guy’s bones is not something you particularly like to hear if your husband’s just passed away. Needless to say, our parents came and dragged us away, apologizing profusely for our “misconduct”.

6) Reading stuff -
But I already mentioned this in the earlier post.

7) Taking pictures of stuff -
I'm not sure if I'm qualified to call myself an "Amateur Photographer". I used to make money off it when I was in the school club, but now it's just regular random pictures of whatever is interesting. But by far the worst part is when relatives ask you to take pictures of various social events. Sometimes, that would be fine, but not when there's another professional guy there, jumping about like spider-man. Photographers are very much like lions. Not in that we pee on rocks, but that we're very territorial. If I walk into another guys turf, he will take me down, either by making my pictures look bad or resorting to the deadliest attack - laughing at my camera. Between his evil looks and the comments of relatives to the tune of "*giggle", "Ohh look who's taking pictures", and "Make sure you focus right this time" you sort of lose interest in your hobby.

8) Sarcasm -
"Someone who tries to peddle sarcasm as a higher form of wit". That's me. Probably because it's easier.

9) Strangely, Making stuff -
As in virtual things. Mostly in Cinema 4D and Photoshop. It's just fun when the bean man you made learns how to walk right. Or when you have the power to sadistically twist the limbs of your creation, and put it back the way it was again. Although it's no fun having to wait a few minutes for renders to complete...

10) Life -
The fact that we, and not fire breathing rabbits, were chosen to rule this earth, is great!
Although I must admit a different type of scourge, in the form of the fire-breathing feminist, is threatening civilization today. hehehe... Don't flame me, please(No pun intended). Just got too many e-mails with "How great is a woman" etc. in the subject line.

Like last time, I don't know anyone who hasn't been tagged already. Woe is me. I doubt this chain is goig to end because of me, so ciao for now!

*Stuff*

Filler post!

Movies I watched the past few days. Being the excellent critic I am, and having my impeccable taste in movies, You can be sure you're getting the truth. :D -

Alien Vs. Predator 2 - It seemed impossible that this movie could be bad. It had Aliens, and Predators. Also a few wimpy humans to boot. All three races fighting in close proximity promised a tornado of alien killing, blood spurting action. But, going against the laws of nature, it sucked. Big time.

Charlie Wilson's War - It's a great movie, just that I don't have much to say about it. Just watch the thing, will ya?

The Golden Compass - This is one great movie! It's got fantasy worlds, talking Polar Bears and flying ship things, all of which ensure a great journey into the world of "His Dark Materials"

Meet the Spartans - Funny in parts, but as a whole, doesn't really get you rolling on the floor laughing. What? you think people don't mean it when they say ROFL?

Jumper - Watched with a couple of friends. It wasn't blockbuster class, but it provided a few good moments. Not enough though.


That 70's Show - Watching the first season. Man this show is awesome!

Heroes - Second season. Some people said it was worse than the first, but I beg to differ. Sylar's alive, more people with cool powers and Peter getting even more powerful!


Will post a proper post sometime AFTER the 23rd or so. Going to India, so will have some stuff to jot down...

I against I

You ever notice that sometimes, your brain just isn’t on your side? There are some situations where you just wanna get it exchanged. “Hey there God, I think you wired this thing in wrong, whaddaya say to a replacement?”. There must be some sort of guarantee plan on the thing right?

Situations like when you’ve got around an hour to waste on the web, and yet you don’t remember all the sites that you made a mental note of. None of what your friends told you, or you read in the paper is brought out. It’s like its playing games with you, dangling your memory just in front, but out of reach. The author of “xkcd” moans about how hard it is to forget, yet here I have it, brother. The human brain does not forget when you want it to. No, it is far too cunning a creature to do that. It knows everything you know. It IS you. So it just forgets the things you need most.

Situations like when you’re heads just about bursting with all manner of hormones, and your brain decides “Okay, forget all reason and let me just remove the locks on the ‘things you never say’ box”. All these years you manage to keep your cool and be the bigger person and exercise that thing called ‘Control’. Then you just lose it. Nothing. You've just let out everything you've managed to keep under wraps.

When I see people going on about "The wonders of the human brain", I feel a distinct need to throw a wet fish at him. Sure, I like my brain. I've become quite fond of it, you could say. But please, God, gimme a link to download the .pdf manual.

I have a Dream

..Said Martin Luther King Jr. I think he meant it. Now, if only people over here tried out the whole "Unity" thing. Instead, they go about digging up sacks of buried sugar to try and re-sell them(News).

Frankly, I, as most of the populace surely is by now, am indifferent to the war. Okay, so maybe there'll be an odd bomb or two but still, life goes on. People just don't give a horses posterior... You see, people can get used to more or less anything. Hell, if they can forgive the retailers for insane prices on anything from toothpaste to hand grenades, What's a war? I could live with a war. Now, no broadband, that's impossible, but war is... do-able. I see something wrong with this, but that's what we've come to.

But don't get me wrong, life's not a bed of roses either. It's got it's fair share of thorns ;-) For example, school seems to have taken on a "Hogwarts" like atmosphere towards the middle of the book. EVERYONE is checked, you can't hang about outside. The idea is "Get inside or bugger off home". Also, when you walk around, your mind starts wandering about all the places which can conceal a gift of C4 and ball bearings. Last Thursday, there was a bag lying on a seat in the bus I was in, and as expected, people got freaked, then finally discovered it only contained books. But yet, a few people just got off the bus. Maybe they thought it was a warning.