Meh...

Is the new year usually not ushered in with much merry making or at least some special ceremony with friends and family?

Some people go out to parties. Though it being a weekday might stifle the crowd a bit. Some others stay at home with family. Some prefer to spend a quiet evening with their friends.

I celebrate by ordering pizza at work. Yeah, I know. I rock. :(

Half of it even got cold because some woman came in looking for a bit of paper which had to be printed. By me.

I'd be very depressed if she hadn't been attractive.

Whoops. There I go again with the "All men are perverts" thing.

:/

Oh Merriness, why must you evade me so this season?

It's the 31st!

And I'm at work.

The first should always fall on a weekend. Now it's going to flash by just like this Christmas did. This year's Christmas was a total bore. The only difference was that there was a lot more to eat. But other than that, it felt just like any other day. I'm pretty sure there was supposed to be something about a dude being born in a crib somewhere, and I think MTV is involved. And three dudes who were rich. Or kings. They gave the newborn some valuables so they could evade the IRS. Or something. I'm pretty sure none of that happened last week.

Anyway, Happy New Year all!

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Also, read this by Jack Point. Makes you think about all those reports you hear in the news, like "Minor explosion in Jerusalem, one flower pot knocked over and two dogs scared. 300 palestinians die in retaliatory missile attacks."

Using Google Reader

I'm extra bored today, so here goes.

Many of you read many blogs. Many of you also keep bookmarking your favourites, and some of you still type in the address of whatever blog you want to visit.

I introduce to thee, Google Reader!
Well not 'I', but.. them. Anyway, since any who don't know about google reader don't know about RSS readers, here's a brief explanation.

An RSS reader, or a feed reader, lets you view the content from all your favourite blogs/sites all in one place. You merely provide the link to your URL of interest once and it will keep updating automatically. Each time there is new content on a listed site, it will report back to your feed reader.

Pics are below.
1) Click here to add a link. This can be a blog address or even a blog name. If you enter a blog name, it will throw up a search results page and you can select which feed to subscribe to. Provide a URL (eg : http://thejestah100.blogspot.com) and it will automatically find the RSS feed from it and add the site, in the example, my blog.

2) This is a list of your subscriptions. Click on one of your subscribed links to see what content has been posted. If you subscribed to my blog, all my posts would be listed when you click on my blog name.

3) This is the content thingy. All the posts from the feed you have chosen are listed here. Click on a title to get the full post. To go to the blog or site, click on the little circle with two arrows in it.

4) This is what a post looks like, in Reader.

-click for large size


Hopefully this will help anyone who has to laboriously click through long lists to see if any new posts have been made.

Happy feedreading!

Do NOT

...play Mass Effect for six hours at a stretch and step outside the next day. Your eyes will be so liberal with the tears they'll be marching for gay rights.

My thumb smells like woman's perfume...

The new year is a knockin'

So 2009 is at our doorstep. Actually, in our doorway and asking to be let in. So this year has been weird. And to sum it up, I'm going to pour out the contents of my "Notes" folder on my phone. It's not really a summary of my actions per se, but more like what was going through my head. Most of them make no sense as single sentences, but are the essence of an idea. I'll expand them so that they can be read.

I'll ignore the fact that most of it was written in the last three months. Also the fact that this is going to be by far my most disjointed post.


- Losing your glasses is like living in a dream. It's all literally just a blur for a while. Thankfully I'm not too handicapped by it. After a while I got used to it.

- As technology progresses, we go from smart people in front of dumb terminals to dumb people in front of smart terminals.

- Master Chief is only a letter away from Master Chef. Halo anyone?

- KFC! The only thing missing is U!

- If I were stuck on some deserted island for eternity, I would make a girl out of coconuts. Even though it is highly likely she'll want to be 'just friends'.

- Everyone needs goals. Even if they're goals such as "I'm gonna eat that ice cream if it kills me".

- People who go "people suck/change/'shouldn't be trusted'" suck. People means you too. Besides, acting like every person you meet is an axe murderer is just lame. I usually ask people and they say no, they haven't murdered any axes recently. But I guess it would bode well for me only if I was an axe. All that from the note "emo, axe murderer".

- And then there's this note for which I can't remember the explanation. "Making things is progress, boring. Life withoutu conflict is teh goal". I dunno. Maybe I tend to go all existential on my phone's ass when I'm half asleep.


Well, there.

:D

*GRIN

*Slight tilt of head

*Handshake and/or hug

*"Merry Christmas"

:)

Merry Christmas + Wallpaper!

Whoa! It's Christmas! And this is my *fifth* Christmas post! What with all this stuff supposedly going on in my life you'd think I have better things to do than post on a blog all week. What is this "work" thing I've gotten myself into, you ask? I seem to be spending all my time with it you say? It's starting to sound like some weird cult? :o What? What have my parents go to say about my dedicating so much to this "work" thing?

Well anyway, since I won't be posting again this season, Merry Christmas to everyone! Here's a chrismassy wallpaper(1440x900), in case you get a toilet brush or something in your stocking.


Full size -
http://thejester100.deviantart.com/art/Christmas-Wall-107009100

The Night Is So Young...

...That it still believes in santa clause and thinks babies are delivered by stalks.

...That it would be illegal to hit it.

...That it still wears diapers.


Meh, was bored. Had phone. Thoughts of that phrase and how to pervert it running through mind.

Good night, those of you not staying up till the wee hours. I lie in bed with this heinous illness.

Signs of the times

Yet another sign of the merry-ness of this season is the steady shift of torrent traffic from predominantly porn to Christmas songs. Speaking of, there are some pretty good albums and custom compilations going around these days. I myself downl-... bought a four CD set of merry tunes for this year. Hopefully the more mellow tones of choirs and the soothing voices of various female performers as they whisper 'White Christmas' will save my fingers from any more damage, brought on by my previous playlist of three albums of Disturbed. I just couldn't stop myself from drumming my fingers onto whatever happened to be close. That and there has been many a fierce battle between me and my keyboard in the course of playing 'Racedriver : GRID'.

That brings me to my next point(!), which is - Play Racedriver GRID. It looks bloody brilliant, and is guaranteed to be more fun than... something very funny. But stay away if you prefer the more arcade-ish environments of Need for Speed. This one has a much grittier feeling to it. The developers, Codemasters, are the same guys who made the Colin McRae series. And I assume their marketing engine is crap. If they had to advertise McDonalds, they'd have a motto like "Sliced Cow with Vegetables", and as I read somewhere, KFC would be "Warm Dead Bird". They should've just stuck a little label on all the NFS:Undercover boxes saying "Don't like this game? Thought so. But THIS instead - [pic]".

This post was in draft for two days, and as I finish this up, I'm sick again. Not just a common cold either. I'm pretty sure it's the Bubonic Plague. Let's see.... "Ring round the rosies(?), pocket full of posies, we all fall down...."

Or it could just be a fever.

Christmastime

I was tagged by Blacklight Existence and so here's the post. Right after this render of an idea I stole from a Calvin & Hobbes strip. Original is here.

This year has been weird. Life has been, as they say, a rollercoaster. That's if you've been on one in which you keep heading down, and down, all the while screaming at the top of your lungs that you don't wanna grow up. List follows - 

- Read less books - I only read a handful of them this year. Switched to reading stuff off the internet.

- Got a job - Coolness.

- Left school - Meh-ness.

- Learned stuff - From ActionScript to local roads, life is an open instruction manual.

- Met people - A few, but they were... okay.

- Changed - I thought I'd never change.

That is all I did the whole of this past year. All the little things seem pretty insignificant. All in all, 2008's been a rough ride. But it's smoothing out now.

Before I forget, listen to "Christmastime" by Aimee Mann. It's an old song but a nice one. 

Paranoia

Golly gee have I got the most awesomest story to tell ya'll.

It happened last Monday when I was on my way home after work. I got on a bus and spot an empty seat. I go sit in it. I notice the guy who was occupying the other half of the seat eyeing me suspiciously. He was looking particularly at my pant pocket, where the top bit of my mp3 player was sticking out in it's black leather case. So anyway, I sit down, and pull out my phone as I had received a message a bit earlier. At this I notice the guy getting a bit jumpy, as if I were a terrorist or something. I mean, I wasn't even particularly raggedy that day. I wore actual office clothing, instead of the regular jeans and t-shirt regimen I follow. Fitted with a slick light blue shirt and swishy grey pants, if I were a terrorist, I was dressed to kill.(:P)

So I put my phone back in my pocket and start fiddling with my earphone wires to get them out of my shirt and into my ears. I stop halfway and pull out aforementioned mp3 player. I flick the magnetic clasp thingy on the casing to open it, making a noticeable "click" noise and lo and behold! Mr. Awareness nearly shouts something like "Adough" and grabs my arm.

Thankfully he didn't yell too loud, so only a few people look back and stare at me with a small black box and a wire leading out of it in my hands, and the other guy still having a grip on my arm.

After the initial hoo-haa of explaining what the wired box was, and much holding up my hand, we had an awkward conversation about bombs being everywhere.

Yet another reason I hate buses.

What I do

So I sit here, coughing my brains out*, with this cold bug that seems to have snuck up on everyone.

Last Saturday was my First Event. Well, the first one for which I did a lot of work. It was a Christmas party for a bank. It was fun. See, I work for an event management company(mostly). When clients(fancy talk for customers) come to us for help in setting up events, we provide them with a set of different themes to choose from and every little extra that can be fitted in with the budget that they propose. So in essence, all they have to do is ask, and we provide everything from stage design to ambient decor. And we provide a preview of what it'll all look like, which is what I do(mostly).

So come event day, we go over there and see that everything gets set up right, that the sound and lights are working, the snow machines at the ready and that the dragons are ready and fed(There are many things that the layman doesn't know about the field of event management).

Then when everything's done, the clients will pat themselves on the back commending each other for a job well done.

Oh well, atleast we get the food. Strawberries + Chocolate = mmmmm.....

:/

Christmas is coming up! That means it's time for you to go to church for the second time this year! Unless you're not catholic or christian or any of the other billion or so religions spawned around Jesus. Or Islamic. No gifts for you then. Go cry in a corner.

Also note that this layout is under constant change now. Presently I have changed the header font to "Arial African American". More change will follow.

*Zombies, take note that I have a shotgun

How To Get What You Want This Christmas

People like lists. So here's a list of things to do to get what you want this Christmas.

1) Be good. This goes without saying, but most people ignore it. This can be a fatal mistake. Being good makes people think "Hey, there's a nice guy, I think I shall buy him something this December". Don't be mislead by the "Sugar and spice and everything nice" line. Sugar is not nice, trust me. And the last time I used spices on anyone they sued me for assault.

2) Remind people. Use any medium possible. But be subtle. A bad message would be "Hello All. Christmas is coming up. Last year, I got many warm greetings and good wishes. Now I have enough to last a lifetime. Send cash or goods, you cheap bastards. Merry Christmas!" A better way to convey that message would be to send a gentle reminder that Christmas is approaching, and hint that you might have something for them. "Hi x! The merriest time of the year is afoot! Santa might have some space in his bag for [thing that friend has been eying] this year. *wink" This does not mean that you must deliver on it. If the friend is brash enough to ask, you can merely brush it off with "You still believe in Santa? Ho Ho Ho biarch!" Hopefully this will be AFTER your chosen friend has gifted you something and you are busily unwrapping it.

3) Do not spread the joy to people that some would dislike. So your holiday greeting card should read "May your days be merry and filled with joy! ...Except for Gehan, he's a bitch" (Just kidding buddy, I'm just bitter I have to go through Christmas looking like a douche :D )

4) Go caroling. Sing Christmas songs. "White Christmas" has much use beyond being racist propaganda. It can be used to trick many an old lady into thinking you are a mere 11 year old. And don't be mislead. Old people have huge stockpiles of useful things. If all else fails, you can just take their pills and sell them on the black market. Pressure and Cholesterol pills are pretty expensive. Just make sure to label them "v-i-a-g-r-a".

5) This should only be done if everything else turns out to be worthless. Steal from Santa. How hard could it be? Big fat man, plus, he'll be stuck in your chimney. But wait. If you have a chimney, here in Sri Lanka you're probably some rich twat. So no, wait for Santa to break in through a window. Keep a cricket bat handy.

The Month of the Merry

December is finally here, and people are getting merry. Christians, Bhuddists and even that other religion in which you blow up stuff.

This being the month of merry making and consumption of much food and drink, you're bound to meet more people. Guys, have a go at it. Just make sure you're not hooking up with the human equivalent of a furry pink hand grenade. Girls, don't hold back. No warning to you since all males are perfect. :P

Hopefully Christmas will take place without any incident and we won't all turn into heathens. What with all these movies being released and the mass conversion to satanism. Oh, and remember when they released Harry Potter and everyone was throwing magic at each other? I was afraid to step out for fear of being caught in a duel.

I'm looking forward to GTA 4 getting on PC's these days. Apparently there are many more ways to kill prostitues with baseball bats in this one. 

Oh well, merry december people.

How To Creep Out Your Friends With Pictures

I realize many of you still don't know about this, so here's a way to figure out which camera/phone make and model was used to take a digital image. Seriously, you can creep people out and claim that you dabble in stalking too, with this little neato trick. All that is needed is windows.

Right Click image of choice > Properties > Summary > Advanced and viola. Click link for larger image.

http://www.deviantart.com/download/105097365/Camera_Details_by_thejester100.jpg

This is for Win XP. Vista users can go figure it out for themselves. And mac users shouldn't be using digital cameras. And linux users probably already have a homemade util to find how, when and where a picture was taken, not to mention the ability to find out the person's mother's maiden name, his father's drinking habits and the number of his girlfriend.

Oh, and if you want to remove this metadata from an image, the easiest method is to copy and paste it into Paint. Then save it as a different file. But this results in quite a bit of quality loss. Or you could use photoshop's "Save for Web" dialog. There's probably some utility on the internet that will remove this stuff on batches of images too.

Oh yeah, don't mind the mess of icons.

:P